Business Trip Written By: Ben Forrester Directed By: Randall Einhorn Transcribed By: Admin Michael: Did you know that in Morocco it is common to exchange a small gift when meeting somebody for the first time? In Japan you must always commit suicide to avoid embarrassment. In Italy you must always wash your hands after going […]
Author: theoffive
Season 05 Episode 07
Customer Survey Written By: Lester Lewis Directed By: Stephen Merchant Transcribed By: Admin Michael: Hey, sport. Dwight: I heard someone got engaged, you dog, huh? [punches Michael’s shoulder] Michael: Ow! God! Dwight: Oh, nothing can hurt you now. You’re a man in love! Darryl: I was there. That dude is not engaged. I’m not a […]
Season 05 Episode 06
Employee Transfer Written By: Anthony Q. Farrell Directed By: David Rogers Transcribed By: Admin Kelly: [dressed as Carrie Bradshaw] Wow, you guys look amazing. Stanley, I thought you hated Halloween. Phyllis: [dressed as Raggedy Ann] Shh. He wears that so he can sleep at his desk. Who are you? Kelly: Oh, I’m Carrie Bradshaw from […]
Season 05 Episode 05
Crime Aid Written By: Charlie Grandy Directed By: Jennifer Celotta Transcribed By: Admin Receptionist: Pam, line three. Pam: Okay, thanks. Pam: New York, as it turns out, is very expensive, and I ran out of money. I thought about selling a kidney, but Michael offered to get me a part-time job at corporate. Pam: Hey. […]
Season 05 Episode 04
Baby Shower Written By: Aaron Shure Directed By: Greg Daniels Transcribed By: Admin Dwight: [looking pregnant] Hey Michael? Michael: Yeah. Dwight: Contractions are coming every ten minutes. Michael: Okay, just remember to keep breathing. Dwight: My cervix is ripening. Michael: Okay, good. Jim: [drawing two family trees on a whiteboard] Jan is about to have […]
Season 05 Episode 03
Business Ethics Written By: Ryan Koh Directed By: Jeffrey Blitz Transcribed By: Admin Pam: [on the phone] Well, I should go. Jim: Alright. I’ll tell everybody here that you say hi. Pam: No, don’t. I’m mad at them. Jim: Why, what happened? Pam: Not one of them called to congratulate me on our engagement. Jim: […]
Season 05 Episode 02
Weight Loss (Part 2) Written By: Lee Eisenberg & Gene Stupnitsky Directed By: Paul Feig Transcribed By: Admin Ryan: [walks in the office] How’s my favorite branch doing? [no one talks, everyone stares at Ryan] All right. [sits at reception] Michael: Ronnie was bleh. Things were at an all time sad here. But then I […]
Season 05 Episode 01
Weight Loss Written By: Lee Eisenberg & Gene Stupnitsky Directed By: Paul Feig Transcribed By: Admin Michael: All right, everybody. This is your last meal, so eat up. [cheering] Dwight: From this point forward, you will not use the bathroom. We need to keep our starting weights high so we can lose more. Michael: This […]
Season 04 Episode 18
Goodbye ,Toby (Part 1) Written By: Paul Lieberstein Directed By: Paul Feig Transcribed By: Admin Dwight: [cell phone rings] Hello, this is Dwight Schrute. [phone keeps ringing] Hello? Jim: [presses button on headset] Hello, this is Dwight. Dwight: Hello? Hello? Jim: Yes, we do have that. Hold on one second… Dwight: Jim, what are you […]
Season 04 Episode 19
Goodbye, Toby (Part 2) Written By: Paul Lieberstein Directed By: Paul Feig Transcribed By: Admin Toby: [Michael hands him a present] Wow, thanks, Michael, I… Michael: Can I just say that, of all the idiots, in all the idiot villages, in all the idiot worlds, you stand alone, my friend. Holly: [enters conference room] Hello. […]