A Benihana Christmas (Parts 1 & 2) Written By: Jennifer Celotta Directed By: Harold Ramis Transcribed By: Admin [Dwight enters the office holding a dead goose] Dwight: Merry Christmas! [holds up dead goose and puts it on Pam’s desk] Pam: Merry Christ–- [looks up] No! Why are you–why did you bring that here? Dwight: Don’t […]
Author: theoffive
Season 03 Episode 09
The Convict Written By: Ricky Gervais & Stephen Merchant Directed By: Jeffrey Blitz Transcribed By: Admin Pam: Ohhhh! She’s absolutely adorable! Hannah: He. Pam: Oh, sorry. He’s–he’s dressed all in pink. Hannah: That’s his favorite color. Pam: Oh. That’s… fun for him. Stanley: Fantastic. Michael: Ohhh, wow. Look at that. How cute. Hannah: Thank you. […]
Season 03 Episode 08
The Merger Written By: Brent Forrester Directed By: Ken Whittingham Transcribed By: Admin [Toby enters the office] Toby: Hey. Pam: Hey. How’d the run go? Toby: Ah, pretty good. I finished. Pam: That’s great. Toby: Thanks. Dwight: [scoffs] Why is that great? Pam: Because he accomplished something. Dwight: What was your mile time? Toby: About […]
Season 03 Episode 07
Branch Closing Written By: Michael Schur Directed By: Tucker Gates Transcribed By: Admin Karen: Hey. Jim: Hey. Karen: Who are you faxing so early in the morning? Jim: Oh, umm… kinda hard to explain. Jim: I don’t have a ton of contact with the Scranton branch, but, before I left, I took a box of […]
Season 03 Episode 06
Diwali Written By: Mindy Kaling Directed By: Miguel Arteta Transcribed By: Admin Kelly: There you go. Michael: Nice dress, Ryan. Kelly: It’s not a dress. It’s a kurta. Michael: [laughing] Okay. Michael: Tonight, one of our most ethnic co-workers, Kelly, has invited us all to a Diwali celebration put on by her community. What is […]
Season 03 Episode 05
Initiation Written By: B.J. Novak Directed By: Randall Einhorn Transcribed By: Admin Dwight: Brain teaser. I have two coins totaling 15 cents and one of them is not a nickel. What are they? Ryan: A dime and a nickel. Dwight: No, I said one of them is not a nickel. Ryan: But the other one […]
Season 03 Episode 04
Grief Counselling Written By: Jennifer Celotta Directed By: Roger Nygard Transcribed By: Admin Michael: Hey Ryan, can I get you a pencil from the warehouse? Ryan: Uh, no thanks, I’m good. Michael: Oh, it’s okay, I’m going down. Ryan: Um… Yeah, absolutely. Michael: All right, I’ll be right back. [goes down pretend stairs] Dwight: [laughs […]
Season 03 Episode 03
The Coup Written By: Paul Lieberstein Directed By: Greg Daniels Transcribed By: Admin [waiting on Pam to be done with the microwave] Michael: Ahhhhhhhhh. [whispering loudly] I’m hungry. Michael: Movie Monday! The only cure I know for the Monday blues is… Varsity Blues! Michael: Let’s gooooo! Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go! Dwight: [directing people […]
Season 03 Episode 02
The Convention Written By: Gene Stupintsky & Lee Eisenberg Directed By: Ken Whittingham Transcribed By: Admin Michael: Pam? Pam: Yeah? Michael: Did you see Oprah yesterday? Pam: No, I didn’t. Michael: I, uh… I am going to be a father. Pam: What was Oprah about? Michael: Angelina Jolie was on. And she adopted a baby […]
Season 03 Episode 01
Gay Witch Hunt Written By: Greg Daniels Directed By: Ken Kwapis Transcribed By: Admin Ryan: Yeah, I’m not a temp anymore. I got Jim’s uh, old job. Which means at my 10 year high school reunion it will not say “Ryan Howard is a temp.” It will say “Ryan Howard is a junior sales associate […]